Annals of Over–Kirk Jones, Circus Freak: Meanwhile, emerging from the back end of the celebrity sausage machine is Niagara jumper Kirk Jones, who might start wishing he never survived the Falls. He won’t be going on 20/20, starring in his own reality show, or chatting with Larry King (wait, maybe he did…). What will he be doing? Jones–and I swear I am not making this up–will be trolling for dollars as a circus act . Billed as “The World’s Greatest Stuntman” in the Toby Tyler Circus–currently knocking them dead in a motley assortment of Mexican border towns–Jones will….well, it’s not exactly clear what he will be doing, but the circus promises it will be “spectacular” (I assume this does not refer to the fact that Jones will be helping clean up after the elephants, which is also part of his contract). Just in case the circus doesn’t launch him to stardom, Jones is pitching a book called “You’re Kidding Me: A Knucklehead’s Guide to Surviving Niagara Falls.” Hey, wasn’t TWC the first to call Jones a Knucklehead? We’ll sue…he’s broke, but so are we.



Would You Pay Money To See This Guy?: Now, if they shot him from a cannon ACROSS Niagara Falls…that would be big