Annals of Inanity–Rovin’, Rovin’, Rovin’: Most people like to climb mountains on foot, but there are always a few who just can’t be bothered to get out of the damn car. Thus, the tale of Alexander Abramov and his trip in a Land Rover to the top of Mount Elbrus, courtesy of our friends at Explorer’s Web. Elbrus is in the Caucasus, and at 5,642 meters tall is the highest mountain in Europe. Abramov got it into his head that he could simply drive to the top, and off he went, with a team of ten pals. When the snow and ice started above 3,750 meters, they put chains on the thing, and used a winch when the vehicle really bogged down. The hardest part was that the Land Rover (here’s a surprise) kept packing it in and Abramov would have to send team members down the mountain to get spare parts (to save time, they paraglided…very cool). After 43 days Abramov and his wacky band finally got the thing to the top of Elbrus (earning a Guinness world record), did a few donuts on the summit, and then promptly took off for a little R&R on the Black Sea…leaving the car behind on the summit (hmmm, do you think there was some vodka making the rounds at the summit celebration?; plus, I wonder what subsequent climbers thought when they struggled to the top and discovered someone had parked there…). A few weeks later the team returned to the summit to ponder how to remove the Land Rover. After deciding it was too cold and icy to drive down, everyone except the driver left to get chains and other gear to winch the car down. But before they could return, the lone driver waiting behind decides “F*ck it, I can drive this thing down,” and hops in (more vodka?). So off he goes and before he knows it he has lost control and the Land Rover is plummeting down the side of Elbrus, accelerating rapidly. Out jumps the driver, just before the poor, benighted Rover impales itself on some rocks at 5,400 meters. Worse, the shock springs a wheel loose and it continues on its merry way….and comes very close to killing the rest of team making their way back up the mountain. Quite an adventure (great pics here). If anyone wants a free Land Rover (needs work) it can be found just above 5,000 meters on the side of a mountain in the Caucasus…..



“Sure, it drives funny. But it’s a world record holder….”