Department Of Dispute Resolution–Everest Speed Record: Last May, a Sherpa named Pemba Dorje claimed that he scaled the world’s highest peak in a mere 8 hours and 10 minutes, setting a new record. Not so fast, said Lakpa Gelu Sherpa, the owner of the previous record. Lakpa suggested the weather was too nasty on the day for Pemba to have made the climb, and added that many climbers on the mountain could not remember seeing him going up. The Nepalese Department of Tourism decided it would arbitrate the dispute, and according to the BBC and Explorer’s Web, the ministry has come down on the side of Pemba Dorje, saying he submitted sufficient evidence in the form of photos, descriptions of items on the mountain, and witnesses, to claim the record. Turns out that these two guys have been trading the record back and forth for a few years now, and each time one of them claims a new record the other guy disputes it. It all seems so grubby and undermines the spirit of climbing and Everest. Here’s a suggestion (switch sarcasm mode on…): from now on these two guys should just go head-to-head. In fact, maybe there should be an annual sprint duel up Everest. I can see sponsorship, ESPN, and plenty of trash talk. The winner could take home the Hillary Cup, and the loser could get his name on the Mallory Plate. Yeah, that’d be the way to go…



Speedy Sherpa Pemba: “This morning I did the breakfast dishes in world record time, but my wife just said I was annoying…”