Kickass Hall Of Fame–Takeru Kobayashi: He’s slight of build, just 132 pounds, and looks as if he could use a good meal. But Kobayashi is a freak of nature, capable of shovelling food into his mouth and down his gullet at simply astounding speeds. He has won the Coney Island hot dog eating contest four years in a row (his current record: 53 and a half dogs), he has eaten 17.7 pounds of cow brains in 15 minutes, and he has consumed 20 pounds of rice balls in a mere 30 minutes. Pardon me a minute, I have to hurl. Okay, I’m back. Kobayashi’s latest feat: this week he won a contest by eating 69 hamburgers in just eight minutes (and pocketing $10,000). For his eating prowess Kobayashi is a certified celebrity in his home country of Japan. In fact, Kobayashi has turned speed eating into a craze there, a controversial one because Kobayashi wannabes keep choking–and even dying–in their attempts to Be Like Takeru. So how does Kobayashi compare to all the other gorge maniacs out there? David Baer, of the International Federation of Competitive Eating, puts it bluntly: “Kobayashi is, without a doubt, the greatest eater ever to live upon planet Earth.” What can I say? We have the pleasure of watching a living legend in action…



“Oh man, there’s got to be a better way to get a Maalox endorsement deal…”