And Now For Something Completely Different…

Are you male, over 65, and bored? Fancy a little adventure, a little male bonding, and an ocean adventure? Then you might want to give 78-year old Englishman Anthony Smith a call. Why? Because Smith is looking for three elderly, interesting gentlemen to join him on a raft for a little jaunt across the Atlantic, from the Canaries to the Bahamas. Smith is a classic example of the Eccentric Adventurer. He has flown a balloon over the Alps, ridden a motorbike the length of Africa, rafted the Amazon, a searched for new species of fish in Iran. He’s even had the pleasure of reading his own obituary (written after he was–mistakenly–feared dead in an African balloon accident). His latest attempt to avoid boredom involves a 45 ft. by 25 ft. raft, built out of massive gas pipes that have been bolted together (some will be sealed and empty for buoyancy, and others will contain water and provisions). It will feature two huts fashioned out of large heating oil tanks, and Smith expects quite a smooth ride for the 50-day voyage. “You can sit on the deck in your bedroom slippers having a drink; I thought it would be far more civilized. We won’t have a fridge, because it needs too much electricity. But there will be food and drink on board,” says. “I like the idea of cultivating bamboo shoots. They grow very quickly and, as anyone who goes to a Chinese restaurant will tell you, they are delicious. If you are Ellen MacArthur, food is enriched protein coming out of a toothpaste tube. We will not be eating out of a toothpaste tube.”

If you are worried it might be dangerous, have no fear. “We will all be tied on to the raft. Being old, we will know what we are capable of,” Smith says. “There have been 43 raft voyages since the Kon-Tiki in 1947 and only one person has died.”

Oh, and it will help a lot if you are interesting: “I would like a raconteur or perhaps a musician with the right kind of instrument – not a violin, which would fail in a salt water environment.”

So what are you waiting for? I guarantee it will beat sitting around watching Dr. Phil and waiting for your dentures to be bleached…



Forget The QE II: “Let’s go, gentlemen, the evening poker game is about to start on the bridge deck…”