Author: timzimmermann

Woodvale Atlantic Update–The Slow Slog: The 14 two-maniac teams still contesting the Woodvale Atlantic Rowing Race are more than two weeks into the voyage from the Canary Islands to Barbados and have yet to hit the halfway mark. Reality has settled in: they are going to be out there for a long time. It’s hot. It’s tiring. It’s frustrating when headwinds, instead of expected tailwinds, show up to torment the sunbaked rowers. There are sporadic moments of exhilaration, particularly when the dolphins show up. But here’s a report from Team Atlantic Wholff, currently in 6th, which begins to capture how unbelievably difficult it is to row across an ocean:

“The nights out here are particularly long, being around 12 hours of darkness. This has meant four shifts each of one and a half hours and waking each other up is becoming increasingly hard! We are however determined to keep up the pace, despite the fact that we are starting to hallucinate. Hugo had a particularly interesting conversation last night with someone about golf!”

Alternative Hallucination Explanation: Shouldn’t They be Drinking Water?….

(Photo: Team Atlantic Wholff)

Shekhdar Update–Bon Voyage…Finally! Marathon rower Jim Shekhdar, 56, is finally ready to tackle the Southern Ocean, after a long delay for repairs to his custom-made cockleshell, followed by a long wait for favorable weather to kick in. With the weather looking good, Jim is preparing to depart Bluff, New Zealand Friday early: “No more excuses – the weather looks right and the boat is ready so I guess I’m going tomorrow morning.” Ummm, how about a little enthusiasm, Jim? Though maybe it is hard to get too excited about an open-ocean row of many thousands of miles through frigid, forbidding waters. Jim hopes to eventually turn up in Cape Town, South Africa. His expected arrival date….May 6, 2004. You can track Jim’s progress here, or read about it in the Wetass Chronicles. See ya, Jim……



Detailed Schematic of Jim’s Vessel: It seems to float…but has been commandeered by an alien

(Image courtesy of Louisa McCulloch, 6)

Annals of Ouch: Surfing. Sharks. Unfortunately, the two sometimes come together. Teenage surfer Bethany Hamilton lost an arm last Friday as she surfed the break off Kauai’s North Shore.

“My arm was hanging in the water, and it just came and bit me,” Hamilton told Honolulu television station KGMB. She said the shark pulled her back and forth, “but I just held on my board, and then it let go.” Doctors at Wilcox Memorial Hospital said Bethany’s top condition as a competitive athlete helped her survive the attack. “It was a very clean amputation,” Dr. David Rovinsky said.

Kudos to the kid. She says she’ll be back on a surf board……..



Bethany Busts One…..Using Two Arms

Transat Jacques Vabre–Pasted!: There is a gale pounding the French coast with 30-40 knot winds, and the TJV organizers have wisely postponed the 60-foot trimaran start until Wednesday. That wasn’t much comfort for the Open 60 monohull fleet, which started on Saturday, and sailed straight into the brunt of the storm. Butchers bill so far: one boat lost its keel, and the two man crew had to be airlifted to safety by helicopter; a second boat was dismasted; seven boats had to put into port with a variety of glithces and breakage; and 6 have withdrawn from the race. Ahh, deep ocean shorthanded racing. It’s probably one of the most brutal sports on earth. Here’s what the sailors have to say:

“It’s impossible to sleep on the boat,” said Alex Thomson on Open 60 Sill over the sat phone: “We haven’t slept for more than 3 hours in total since the start. The boat bangs down on each wave and the seas are difficult. Other than that I am having a great time sailing with Bilou, and this boat is the right one to be on in these conditions…” “The sea is still pretty huge with 6m crests and crossed seas off Ushant. There’s 38 knots of wind and I can hardly speak to my co-skipper Olivier because there is too much noise around us!” said Regis Guillemot on Open 50 Storagetek. Brian Thompson on Ecover sounded out of breath on the satellite phone: “Its been another rough night with 30-35 knots. We’re jumping over waves and heading over the continental shelf, which normally has big waves. We can’t see them, but we can definitely feel them. Last night Sam Davies on Team Cowes was finally able to send in his first report from the boat: “It has been a bit rough (understatement of the year) but it didn’t feel dangerous at any point. I was knocked off the helm a couple of times by some big waves that just lifted me up as they swept down the deck. I was clipped on, of course, so managed to get back to the helm before she crashed tacked. (something that would take at least a quarter of an hour to recover from) It has been really close…I could hear some of the others around in the night doing manoeuvres, trimming sails…which was a bit weird. The boat’s been shaken around a lot – one of the solar panels on the stern has ripped off and some kit down below has literally been shaken from the fittings but apart from that we are in good shape and looking forward to when the conditions may ease a bit later tomorrow.”

Conditions are finally easing today, and the two-man crews are settling into their routines for the long run to Brazil. Britain’s ECOVER has a 12.5 mile lead as the boats head towards the Bay of Biscay…..



“I say, Jack, is this thing a boat or a submarine?…..”

Pacific Windsurf–Finis!: On Sunday French sailboarder Raphaela Le Gouvello finally touched the shores of Tahiti….after 89 days and 7 hours at sea. Merde. The last week of her 4455 mile voyage from Peru was agony, as extremely light winds kept Le Gouvello at her sail, holding its weight, for hours and hours every day. She’s not stopping there, though. After taking a break to rest and recuperate, she’ll eventually continue on to Australia. Must be sunstroke…..



“Thanks, guys. Now put me down and get me a steak…..”

Everest Update–Bye-Bye Berg: Well, that’s the way it goes sometimes. After climbing to the South Summit in near-perfect conditions, Wally Berg and his team were greeted by a sudden and dramatic increase in wind speed. Berg then made a tough, disciplined, decision. He ordered everyone to turn around and head back down the mountain. Berg explains:

“Now think about that, the South Summit is higher than K2. That’s where we all were today. The South Summit of Everest is only about 400 or 500 feet lower than the summit of Everest. Of course to traverse you cross quite an exposed ridge, including the Hillary Step. I was almost shocked, although I probably shouldn’t have been–Michael Fagin told me, “You’d better be careful, those winds might pick up on the 2nd.” They certainly did. So with mixed emotions we turned around. It was definitely the call. The clock was running against me. I had a turn around time of 10 hours, 10 hours from the South Col to the Summit. That’s a 300 foot ascent rate if you want to talk in feet. It took us nine hours to get the entire group to the South Summit. In the conditions we had this morning, we wouldn’t have been out there in one hour. We would have been out there in two hours or more. And that was a factor. But those winds really clinched it for us.”

It must have been a major disappointment after all the months of planning and acclimitization. But that’s how you live to climb another day. Berg will be headed to Antarctica next, late in the month. Does is this guy ever take a break?



Heading Home: Everest Wins the Final Round…..

(Photo: Berg Adventures International)

Annals of Adventure–Transat Jacques Vabre: Starting Saturday, 76 world class sailors will set out in 38 boats to race across the storm-strewn Atlantic. The Transat Jacques Vabre only comes along every two years, and it is without doubt one of the most compelling, dramatic…and potentially catastrophic races on the calendar. The cream of the fleet consists of 17 Open 60 monohulls and 14 60-foot trimarans. These boats are the thoroughbreds of the ocean racing world, and their two-handed crews will fight the weather and each other tooth and nail from Le Havre to Salvador in Brazil. The monohull Open 60s will leave Saturday, and sail a 4,340 mile course: across the Bay of Biscay, down through the tradewinds, across the Equator and on to Brazil. The turbo-charged 60-foot tris–which can cruise at 20-30 knots, with everything but the leeward hull out of the water–are scheduled to leave Sunday. They will sail a longer course–5,300 miles–that requires them to leave Ascension Island in the South Atlantic to starboard. The Atlantic is conjuring up its usual witches brew to greet the sailors, with an intense storm scheduled to hit the French coast over the weekend. The Open 60s will get off alright, before battening down offshore to weather the blast. The trimaran start may have to be delayed, however, because race organizers fear the spindly craft will be beat into flotsam if they venture out on schedule. A similar race last year sent the trimaran fleet through heavy weather, and the result was carnage: most of the fleet capsized or broke into very expensive chunks of carbon fiber. Delay or no, there’s no getting around the fact that racing shorthanded across the Atlantic in November…with just two crew….who will get barely any sleep for the next two weeks….while trying to keep the world’s most overpowered sailboats under control…is some crazy sh*t. People can die–and have–doing this. So settle back and prepare for some spectacular racing. But be prepared to cover your eyes. This race can get ugly, and the Wetass Chronicles will be bringing you regular reports……..



“Alors, Jean-Luc! I know this lightens the boat, but there’s no way I’m going all the way across the Atlantic like this…”

(Photo: Yvan Zedda)

Wetass of the Week–“Here, Sharky, Sharky”: STOCKHOLM (Reuters) – An Icelandic fishing captain, known as “the Iceman” for his tough character, grabbed a 660-pound shark with his bare hands as it swam in shallow water toward his crew, a witness said Thursday. The skipper of the trawler “Erik the Red” was on a beach in Kuummiit, east Greenland, watching his crew processing a catch when he saw the shark swimming toward the fish blood and guts — and his men. Captain Sigurdur Petursson, known to locals as “the Iceman,” ran into the shallow water and grabbed the shark by its tail. He dragged it off to dry land and killed it with his knife. “He caught it just with his hands. There was a lot of blood in the sea and the shark came in and he thought it was dangerous,” Frede Kilime, a hunter and fisherman who watched from the beach, told Reuters by phone from Greenland.



“Uh-oh. Who’s this crazy mo’ fo’ sneaking up behind me…..”

Woodvale Update….Surfin’: The transatlantic rowing race leaders have finally passed under the 2000 miles to go marker, and are surfing along in strong northeast tradewinds. Some of the boats are putting in 80-90 mile 24-hour runs, and Calderdale Challenge almost hit 100 miles. It’s wild and wet out there, reports Holiday Shoppe Challenge, currently in second place:

“I was looking up at Jesus through my feet,” said Jamie ‘Quote of the Day’ Fitzgerald, “I was looking skyward past my feet. It felt like the boat was vertical before we surfed down the front of the wave.” …“That one particular wave was as close as we’ve come to what felt like a potential capsize or pitch pole,” said Kevin Biggar, “We were both rowing together at the time, trying to extract as much speed out of the boat as possible, when a series of good sized waves seemed to cross over and double up right where we were positioned. There was white water everywhere. It was fantastic, if a little unnerving.”

“Is it just me, or are we rowing uphill…..”

(Photo: Challenge Business)

Annals of Adventure Medicine–Shrinkage: There’s one risk Wally probably never figured on as he planned this year’s Everest attempt. According to ExplorersWeb, a rather unusual Base Camp study has shown that high altitude decreases testosterone and sperm counts in male climbers…for a period up to two years after an expedition. Post-7800 meter sperm were also determined to be abnormally shaped (were they shivering, too?), a bizarre effect which fortunately rights itself after a few months. The sample size was understandably limited to three climbers, given the fact that Everest climbers have quite enough going on at Camp 3 and above without having to, ummmmm…..I mean, the logistics are daunting. You’re talking really cold hands (mittens?) and….okay, I’ll stop. No word on who the three horny heroes are, or whether women climbing team members were available to assist in the research. Doctors at Base Camp would like to continue the study, however, so next year Everest may become home to a “Five Mile High” club…….and climbers will have to start knocking.



Frigid Temps Caused Unusual Research Problems: “Hey, Doc, I’m done…Do you have a scraper?”