It’s always annoying when your outboard won’t start. But it’s heart-pounding when it won’t start while you’re inside the surfline. So maybe it’s not too suprising that when it DOES start you hit the throttle and try to get the hell out of there…with somewhat predictable results. Watch–end cringe–by clicking here. And pay close attention to the guy in front…
This Is How It’s Really Done…
Category: Uncategorized
Wetass Hall Of Fame: Howard Hall…
Every once in a while you come across someone whom you’d happily trade lives with. Howard Hall, probably the best underwater cinematographer ever, is one of them. He’s been in the business for decades, he’s made award-winning films (both standard and IMAX), he’s written books, and if it’s interesting he’s dived there. Just a few minutes on his website will reveal an incredible life. And just like the old Saturday Evening Post, TWC will every once in a while (in other words when I feel like it, or I remember) bring you one of his amazing tales. First up is an account of Hall’s 1979 confrontation with the Japanese fishermen of Iki Island, who were about to murder 1000 dolphins trapped in a Bay (in the belief that doing so would help local tuna stocks). Here’s an excerpt:
An angry fisherman approached and put his spear to my throat. I didn’t need to understand Japanese to know that he wanted me to put my cameras away. I did so. Then another fishermen came up to me with a spear. He placed it in my hand and gestured toward the dolphins lying on the beach. I understood this gesture too. Was I with them or was I against them? They demanded a demonstration. I looked around. I was alone on the beach with a hundred angry fishermen. Hardy was still across the bay with the first two angry men. I had no idea where Dexter was. I had entirely forgotten about him. The fisherman gave me a slight shove. I grinned at him and shrugged my shoulders doing my best to act nonchalant. Then I turned and walked down to the beach where a dolphin lay wrapped in a net. I could see the dolphin looking at me. Its skin was dry and cracked, but its eye was moist and alive. The air was filled with the sound of dolphins whistling as they lay on the beach, their skins burning and cracking under the morning sun. I could feel the eyes of a hundred fishermen behind me. My mouth was bone dry as adrenaline rushed through my system. My knees threatened to fold beneath me. What is the right thing to do here, I wondered. Can the murder of a sentient being be justified even if its death is absolutely inevitable? Even if that death may help save the lives of thousands of its kind? I whispered to the dolphin, “I’m sorry my friend, but you’re already gone.” Then I raised the spear.
Pretty gripping, huh? And heartbreaking. Read the whole story here, but make sure you have a strong stomach because the pictures feature oceans of dolphin blood. Here are some slightly more pleasant ones from Hall’s undersea journey…



Speed And Envy….
Windsurfing whiz Finian Maynard is the King Of All Speedsailing, and owner of the outright speed sailing record at 48.70 knots. But there are plenty of pretenders to his crown, and they are organizing a little record-breaking session at one of the world’s great speed sailing venues: Walvis Bay in Namibia. Go here to check it all out. And make sure you hit this video (Warning: Very Strange Music alert…), and this video (Warning: Very Bad Music alert…), as you pass through. I’ll put my money on Finian any time, but it never hurts to have more people out there sailing their asses off at crazy speeds…


Annals Of Ingenuity…
It doesn’t matter what your ride is, as long as you get out on the water…
Octopus Orgy…
Speaking of octopii (see below, and no, this is not what you think), there is an entire website devoted to all things Octopudinal. It’s called Tonmo.com, and it’s got everything (Mission statement: “We’re committed to being the best resource available for all things cephalopod, in terms of both community and content”). We’re talking Discussion forums, Octopodcasts, galleries, and, or course, videos. And for anyone who is really out to waste time, the videos are not half bad. For example, you can watch an octopus attack a crab here. And then dance with a flamboyant cuttlefish here. The Octopus aficianodos. Who knew…
Tonmo Man: “Well, I don’t get a lot of dates, so I have plenty of time for ink…”
When Octopii Attack…
Here’s a wild story (courtesy of TWC reader Dominique Labrosse) about a giant Pacific Octopus that didn’t take kindly to a visit from a remotely-piloted sub. Even better, the sub had video, and you can watch it here. Here’s the gist:
The giant Pacific octopus weighs about 45 kilograms, powerful enough to damage Mike Wood’s remote-controlled submarine.
Wood’s first reaction was to panic, knowing the marine creature can exert a powerful bite.
“I go full reverse and blast him with all these seabed particles,” said Wood, describing the attack shown in the video. “Finally, he lets go and disappears off into the gloom.
“It was desperation. It’s a $200,000 machine, and it’s not insured,” said Wood, who runs SubOceanic Sciences Canada in Duncan, B.C.
Score one for the tentacled ones…
“Damn, if I hadn’t just snacked on that mini-sub, I’d really give this idiot a scare…”
Have A Wetass Weekend…
“Whaddaya mean I can’t join your yacht club? It’s the perfect pin boat…”
Multi Versus Mono…
This is an age-old debate. But when it comes to visuals, the mono argument gets owned. We’ve previously featured the notorious Gunboat video. Now have a look at AC cat Stars & Stripes running wild through a mono fleet (click here). For your edification, here’s a brief summary of this cool cat from the Morrelli and Melvin website:
Stars and Stripes is occasionally raced in the Newport to Ensenada race and has also been to Europe, blowing the doors off all competition. Stars and Stripes is easily one of the fastest sailboats in the world.
Stars and Stripes showed us the extremes in size and power that could be achieved in catamarans. Awesome is an apt description of performance in less than ten knots of breeze, recording fifteen knot boat speeds in less than five to six knots of wind. Intended to last only for the summer of 1988, she looks as good as new in 2001.
The original design was a collaboration of the Sail America Design Team, of which Gino Morrelli was a member. Stars and Stripes is an inspiration of what a true sailing machine can be. With incredible ability to create her own apparent wind, she is a sailor’s sailboat and a joy to sail. Stars and Stripes was sold in the Fall of 2002 and is currently being refitted.
It may be a long time before another unlimited America’s Cup comes to pass. For this reason, the two catamarans emerging out of the 1988 America’s Cup may not be equaled on an America’s Cup race course for years to come.
Stars and Stripes was first to finish in all races started (except the last) during the 3 years of the Steve Fossett’s program.
This video comes courtesy of TWC reader Tami Shelton, and it just proves–once again–that multihulls are fun, fun, fun…
“Hey, Steve, do you see any other monohull-mokes we can embarrass…”
Ice Is The New Black…
What is it with frigid swimming? Suddenly everyone wants to be paddling around the frozen stuff. Well, meet Simone Arrigoni. His wrinkle is that he wants to set the record for swimming under the ice. You can read about this insane bid, I mean bold attempt, here. But basically Arrigone plans to cut two holes in a frozen lake, 30 meters (yes, 30 meters) apart. Wearing nothing but a 5 mil wetsuit (and no fins) Arrigone will drop into one hole and hope to hell he can find the other. The article notes: “The particular discipline of under-ice swimming is relatively new and at the moment is practised in few other countries.” Hmm, I wonder why…
Simone The Sub: “Want to know my secret? That water bottle next to me is filled with vodka…”
The Tangerine Dream…
Get me a smoke. The visual alchemists at Teton Gravity Research have put together an amazing trailer for this XXX Ski Porn DVD. Great photography, nice cuts, a few jawdropping scenes, and perfect soundtrack music (which kicks in about halfway through). Here’s the promo copy:
The Tangerine Dream is a film that represents 10 years of broken down trucks, whiskey bottles, wanderlust and the most down and dirty skiing and boarding you have ever seen. This rusty orange story is about the origins of TGR, outlaw athletes and the ragged lifestyle that has kept this posse’s dream and way of life alive. The movement is stronger than ever with Nobis accomplishing the impossible in Alaska, the Olenicks taking their park skills to AK, Jeremy Jones straight-lining 50 degree spine walls, Sage fusing style and big mountain and Dana Flahr emerging as a dominate force in s kiing. This vagabond tale will take you through the lifestyle of skiing and the passion that continues to change the face of the sport. Take a ride in the orange truck that started it all on a rowdy road trip through India, Turkey, Switzerland, France, Alaska, Aspen, Utah, Montana, California and Jackson Hole.
Watch it here. Order it here. We are not worthy…
“Does this look steep? It feels steep…”