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Here are the latest pics from Movistar Telefonica HQ. Movistar just departed Rio, headed for the barn in Spain.

Beach cats can be a lot of fun. Check out this vid. And I’ve got some cool pics from Jake Kohl at Team Seacats…

“Fall a little faster, dammit! Right now, I’ve only got your leg in the frame…”

“Woo-hoo. That’s a perfect 10! They stuck the landing…”

Hey, we’ve all had money problems. But I bet no one has ever tried to resolve them in quite the same way as Brit performance artist (is that redundant?) Mark McGowan. McGowan wanted to pay off his student debt, so he came up with a brilliant payment plan: he rolled a nut all the way across London using his nose, ending at #10 Downing Street (that’s Prime Minister Tony Blair’s home for all you social studies-challenged Wetasses). It took him two weeks, and he left the nut and a letter at Blair’s front step, asking him to accept the nut as payment for the loans. Blair should accept it, of course, because this sort of insane behavior SHOULD BE ENCOURAGED. It took McGowan two weeks to make the journey. And it wasn’t pleasant. “The streets were dirty. There was hair and spit and bird poo. There were unmentionable things,” he said. Thanks, umm, for not mentioning them. And go have a beer, Mark. Nice work…

Nutter: “Uh-oh. I’ve never seen so many used condoms…”
(Thanks to TWC Asst. Editor Dave “How ’bout this one?” Ross)

This is a big weekend. There are three major sailing events on tap.

Let’s kick it off with one of my favorites, the Nokia Oops Cup (Letterman would love that name” “Uma, Oops, Uma, Oops”). The Oops series is sailed in 60-foot tris, and over the next few months will tour the Baltic. The kickoff regatta this weekend is off Helsinki. This year, our old pal Bruno Peyron, with navigating sidekick Roger Nilson, will be in the thick of it. Check out this excellent movie (click “Features,” then “Nokia Oops 2004” video). It’s got a pop soundtrack, lots of musical Swedish babbling, and great shots of the sailing…

Also on tap, the Rolex Transatlantic Challenge. I have mixed feelings about this one. If Maximus makes it (they’ve been having major teething problems), and can line up against Mari Cha IV, then this thing will be interesting. If not, it will be fun to watch Mari Cha, but other than that it will mainly be a transatlantic rally for really, really rich guys on their really, really nice boats. You can read the latest news from Mari Cha here. If we’re lucky we’ll be getting a report or two from a special correspondent onboard Mari Cha, but I don’t want to put any pressure on him so I won’t name names…

Finally, there will be some hardcore racing across the Pond. Sunday is the start of the Calais Round Britain Race, and seven Open 60s will be burning up the track. Check out the list of entrants. We’re looking at some of the best Open 60 sailors on the planet. TWC favorite Mike Golding has stacked his team with Brian Thompson and newly named Volvo Open 70 skipper Neal McDonald. We’ll follow him around. In the meantime, you can amuse yourself watching tons of video from the 2003 race. This is going to be a great one…

Oops Cup Oops: “Hey, Knut! Watch your driving. Dammit, are you listening to Abba again on your IPod?”

I don’t know, but they sure can shoot the basketball. Best not get in a game of HORSE with them. Check it out…

The Tybee 500 is hard enough without having to contend with massive stinkpots that blow past at close range. But if they behaved they wouldn’t be called stinkpots. Here’s what happened to our buddy Tad on Team Velocity:

“Once again I’m reminded of the fickleness of mother nature after a day like today. The day began with about 3 knots of wind with some impressive surf. You know its going to be an interesting launch when the local surfers are out just next to the start line. Shortly after the start we popped open the chute and pulled out in front of a couple boats. We were stoked. Wind piped up to 10 knots and more northeasterly with a sloppy 2 to 3 foot chop. It was enough to single trap but still was overpowering in the puffs. We could double trap because it would imbalance the boat. Our good friends at Windy Hill had pulled away from us, but we still had 3 boats behind us when catastrophe struck. We were double trapped and crossing an inlet when a fairly large sportfishing boat crossed our bows no more than 20 feet away. Trey and I exchanged well wishes to each other while we watched the wake quickly approach. I was hooked into the chicken line but Trey was only using footstraps. As the 2nd wake wave submarined our bows, it felt as if we had just been hit by a garbage truck. My chicken line held but Trey was washed off. As he made his way to the leward side of the boat via the trapeze wire, I tried to unhook from the chicken line in time to grab the tiller and put the boat in irons. I was to slow getting in off the trap and she went over. Took us only 5 minutes to right the boat but the energy that is required to perform the maneuver just saps your strength when your dealing with the conditions we were sailing in. It was disappointing only because we finished 12 minutes behind the next boat.”

And I thought Rodney Dangerfield was dead. Meanwhile, the SailMax team has put both their boats into the top 5. Nice work…

A More Unusual Tybee Hazard: “Heh-heh. Here they come. Time to warm the water up…”

On May 21, this spanking new New Zealand supermaxi (with the pathetically Freudian name) will hopefully line up against Mari Cha IV in the Rolex Transatlantic Challenge. She was supposed to compete in Antigua race week, but the freighter delivering her from New Zealand broke down. Now, she’s scrambling to get to New York in time. Hopefully, she’ll make it. And if you want a nice preview of the boat and program, check out this video…

“Hey, guys! I know the boat is big. But we’ll never make it to New York in time if you don’t hike your lazy asses out…”

Ed Viesturs finally bagged his final 8000er this morning, getting to the summit of Annapurna. He’s the first American to nail all 14 (and now we have to wait and see if he will be the first American to summit all 14 AND get back down). Viesturs website doesn’t have the report yet. But Explorer’s Web does because they’ve been in sat phone contact with the Italian team (annoying Flash site warning) that led the way, fixing ropes and doing all the hard work…

Are The Italians Taking Light “Alpine Style” Too Far?: “Basta! So I’m not a good packer. You’d think that Ed “Mega-Sponsor” Viesturs could have lent me a shirt at least…”

So here’s the idiot who clipped Ellen’s tri. Nice that he got a bumper right onto her bow…

“Hey, Buddy! Put that bottle down and get your ass out here…”